We can’t help it, sometimes we just want to add spice in our lives and upload cute photos in our Instagram feed. Do more things that make you forget to check your phone. A blind man walks into a bar… And a chair… and a table…. Look what finally decided to show up. —Paulo Coelho”, “Have you posed by a naked statue today? It’s like punching people in the face but with words. The happiest people don’t have the best of everything, they make the best of everything. They call it a ‘selfie’ because ‘narcissistic’ is too hard to spell. The word “studying” was made up of two words originally “students dying”. The more people I meet, the more I love my cat. I’m at the point of parenting where “What did I just say?” could either be a threat or a genuine question. “I miss you like an idiot misses the point.”. For the love of God, please stop posting pictures of yourself. That moment when you realize your childhood is over. But as you write, you will surely master the art of writing good captions. This funny cartoon depicts how the rest of Canada views B.C. When my bra matches my underwear, I really feel like I have my life together. Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside. 35+ Captions For Bee Costumes for Instagram Post (Updated DEC 28), 55+ Justin Bieber Captions for IG INCLUDED Lyrics from New Album, 47 Incredible Golden Birthday Captions for Instagram Pictures, Enjoy! If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ. I literally have to remind myself all the time that being afraid of things going wrong isn’t the way to make things go right. Some are made of sarcasm, wine and everything fine. When the sky turns pink, it’s time for a drink! You and I are more than friends. Some of us just want a tan.” — Mandy Hale. Behind every successful man is his woman. Can we just skip to the part of my life where I travel the world? The most important thing is to enjoy your life – to be happy – that’s all that matters. Best friends eat your lunch. Some people are like clouds. Always remember that you’re unique. For proper retaliation, you need a good sort of Sarcastic Quotes For Haters that can be used along with the picture you share. 87. You laugh. !My bed is a magical place. I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I Live And I Learn But I Wait My Turn. Yea, dating is cool but have you every had stuffed crust pizza? It may hurt you to look back in past or scare you to think what the future has in store for you, but those things might not happen if you have a best friend in the present with you. ... A catchy caption is greatly important to bring the reader into view of the post. Postponed. When your ex texts you after months, “Hey, what’s up?”. You actually have friends? Also food. Life doesn’t have any hands, but it can sure give you a slap sometimes. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away. Asher. There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn’t jump puddles for you. Give me the chocolate and nobody gets hurt. Did you know that DIET stands for: Did I Eat That? Fight for you. I’m a math teacher. This life is hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid. Use our list of funny, inspirational, and cute beach captions and quotes for friends, couples, or selfie beach photos. Just saw the smartest person when I was in front of the mirror. You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera. I can sea clearly now; Summer is a state of mind. I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly. So I go back to being normal! Skin gets darker. Funny enough. Life is not a fairy tale. Love how some people try to get you down. I know that somewhere in the Universe exists my perfect soulmate … but looking for her is much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza. If it comes back, it was meant to be. It’s just a hill get over it. Yea, dating is cool but have you ever had stuffed crust pizza? Sometimes I pretend to be normal. A smile is a curve that sets everything straight. I’ll never try to fit in. We’ve also rounded up some short Instagram captions for you, when time is of the essence. I am in a flirtationship. Wish You Were Me? Seriously, enough with the selfies. There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation. While love life is life, food is lifer and we mean that in the most literal sense. In bed, it’s 6 AM. BRB = I don’t want to talk to you. When I feel a little down, I put on my favorite high heels and dance. You don’t have to like me. The idea is to die young . I’m on a seafood diet. – Robert Orben, If summer had one defining scent, it’d definitely be the smell of barbecue. Says he wants to whisper something in your ear, screams! Funny Animal Memes With Captions and Funny Pictures and Be stupid, be dumb, be funny, if that’s who you are. One should always be in love. Make love, not war. “Folks, I don’t trust children. Changed all my passwords to incorrect, then every time I forget my password, it says “your password is incorrect”. Another selfie, I hope those likes give you the confidence you need to get through your day. Stay safe, eat cake! Chances are, you’ll hear some crosswords. I’m jealous of my parents, I’ll never have a kid as cool as theirs. If you fall, I will be there. Here are the best Instagram captions for sisters. I have a case of wanderlust. looks green and sunny and the caption over the province reads "Oooh! Do I really look like a guy who spent the past hour trying to get the right lighting for this selfie? A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it. So, you’re one of the girls who posts selfie on Facebook? If I had a flower for every time I thought of you…I could walk through my garden forever. Just one more minute. Best Sassy Instagram Captions – if you dare! 6 Funny Captions For Girls. I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around. LIFE, EYELINER, EVERYTHING. Sometimes I need expert advice. You don’t have to jump high for people to like you, love you, want to be with you, and notice you. I live for the nights that I can’t remember with the people that I won’t forget. But first, it will piss you off. Jan 10, 2021 - Explore Shakman63.com's board "Funny captions" on Pinterest. Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity. – Unknown, Summer is here. Unless you’re a banana. Have you ever meet a hater that’s doing better than you? I hope we are good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. Let’s just stay friends=never talk again. You are a serious rock star, but you need much more efforts to start my rock. — All the Stars by Kendrick Lamar & SZA, Feeling like a boss, and staring at the stars, it doesn’t matter the cost, ’cause everybody wants to be famous. Brains are awesome. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars. Throughout, your life can find a person who never gets bore with your talks. I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance. Friends knock on the door, best friends walk into your house and start eating. I make it like five or six times, you know, just to be sure. – Kellie Elmore, Summer bachelors like summer breezes, are never as cool as they pretend to be. Either accept it for what it is or let it go. Tell ’em to go out there with all they got and win just one for the Gipper. Too bad, if you liked it, you should have put a ring on it. I am not feeling lazy actually. For me being in math class is like watching a foreign language movie without any subtitles. I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat. Hilarious funny Instagram captions will change your Instagram is not just about posting a quality photo, you can also share fun silly moments with your friends or yourself.This social media source is great for sharing all those special funny moments that you can always go back and laugh about as well as letting your friends capture this while scrolling through there feed. – James Dent, Summer: Hair gets lighter. Short Quotes for Instagram. Not everyone has good taste. You may win, but in the end you’re still a retard. Long line at Starbucks, first world problems. DEJA POO: The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before. DEPRESSO. For every action, I have a clever reserve caption. You just have to be yourself, and you will be accepted for who you are. You must be an amazing photographer. Just me. My favorite music is your voice. Alcohol will give different, type of superhuman power! Either you’re on a roll or you’re taking shit from asshole. I really thought you already knew. By the way, I’m wearing the smile you gave me. I need a six-month holiday, twice a year. With great power comes great electricity bills! It’s not about who would let me, it’s about who will stop me? Dear Lord. It is Priceless to find friends with same mental disorder. My diet plan: make all of my best friends cookies; the fatter they get, the thinner I look. Oh you’re a model? My life is a constant battle between my love for food and not wanting to get fat. Some people arrive and make such a beautiful impact on your life, you can barely remember what life was like without them. Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. Brains are an awesome tool. THEY ARE HARD TO COME BY. You have come to the perfect place. I wouldn’t call them lies! Sometimes I have to tell myself it’s not worth the jail time. Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life. – Coco Chanel. Keep on hating. I’m a smart person, I just do stupid things. Buy an iPhone they said, it comes with a map, they said. Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death! 91. Instagram is down, just describe your lunch to me. I love sarcasm. Who’s that cute person? So, I tried it at my friend’s home. Yes, I am a crazy cat lady. If you don’t like this one, you’re definitely not going to like the other one. If you listen carefully then the earth has a lot of music for you in store. Love can be unselfish, in the sense of being benevolent and generous, without being selfless. You never know what you have until you clean your room. Even the cake is in tiers. By now we hope you have found one of your funny Instagram captions to put under your photo.There’s so many quotes in the world. Yes, Out of time, patients and money. It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness. A beautiful woman delights the eye; a wise woman, the understanding; a pure one, the soul. The more you weight, the harder you are to kidnap. DEPRESSO. Three mistake did by everyone. It’s funny how the people who know me the least have the most to say. I didn’t choose the thug life, the thug life chose me. I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere. I’ll be poor. I think you’ve got a deficiency of Vitamin Me! It’s me. I might have accomplished all three.”, “When people tell me, ‘You’re gonna regret that in the morning,’ I just sleep until noon. We love the things we love for what they are. Me neither. Shoot for the moon. It’s okay if you don’t like me. It’s why suitcases have wheels now. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. Thank you for showing us all how lonely and pathetic you are. Yeah, my selfie just got 24 likes. Wake up beautiful.”, “An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough.”, “I tried to be normal once. For everyone that doesn’t like me, it goes mind over matter. You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. Just one more movie, just one more minute. There’s a girl out there with love in her eyes and flowers in her hair. Worrying about your followers, you need to get yo ur dollars up. You’re just creating your own little drama out of pure insecurity. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure. Deserve you. People who are too weak to follow their dreams will always find a way to discourage yours. Why should I disillusion them? 1. Water gets warmer. Life is like a balloon. I love sarcasm. One plus two equals me and you. I am not feeling lazy actually; I am just incredibly motivated to do nothing. Here are some of the most generic captions for every occasions. I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong. You know that feeling when the really cute girl walks by in the mall, and you smile, try to be smooth, and take a drink of tea, and run the straw up your nose? Then I do the things. —. College lectures would be so much fun with Game of Thrones references. Hey girl, feel my sweater. Hey girl, I like the way we finish each others, sandwiches. People who hate You are the ones who view your profile the most. When the bus driver starts driving before you even get to your seat. Being famous on Instagram is like being rich on Monopoly. This week I was pulled over by a cop. I have always depended on the kindness of strangers. 33 Instagram Captions For Backyard Picnics PICS, Special 47 Captions For Leap Day INCLUDE Leap Quotes, 39 Atlanta Captions for Instagram Pictures INCLUDE Quotes about Atlanta, BEST (37+) Beer Instagram Captions Quotes for Your Cool Party PIC, 51+ BEST IG Caption For Grandparents & Quotes about Grandparents. I hope I didn’t wake you and I’m sorry if I did but I just want to tell you that you’re an amazing and beautiful person and I hope you have a great day! I don’t know what’s tighter, our jeans or our friendship. My pillow gives me a new style of hair every morning! If Cinderella’s shoe fit perfectly, why did it fall off in the first place? Mental stimulation and an emotional connection between two people trump a physical and love connection any day. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments. Don’t worry if you haven’t found your true love, they’re just with someone else right now. . People are like Oreos. What if the princess wants to be with Bowser but Mario keeps kidnapping her. Check out some of these side-splittingly funny captions below, remember to upvote your fave ones, and read through Bored Panda's interview with the main moderator of the subreddit, Xalaxis! Selfies are pictures that speak about you. Sometimes, all you need is a change in scenery. Toto, I’ve got a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore. unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything. If I was funny, I would have a good Instagram caption. Girls just wanna have sun. There is no such thing as a perfect person, but someone’s heart can have the perfect intention. Scenery Captions For Instagram. EVERYTHING I LIKE IS EITHER EXPENSIVE, ILLEGAL OR WON’T TEXT ME BACK. Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal. When one door closes, another one opens. One plus two equals me and you. We try to keep this article up to date, adding always more and more quotations we find. A party without a cake is just a meeting. Like “Why Did I ever date you?”. What others think of me is none of my business! I try not to work too many Sunday. F.R.I.E.N.D.S. And a table. Some people have so little going on in their lives, they would rather discuss yours. I love places that make you realize how tiny you and your problems are. I’m here for a good time not a long time. Forget the butterflies, I feel the whole zoo when I’m with you. What do you call a thieving alligator? So I could fly over certain people and shit on their heads. Even after we die, we can become ghosties and scare people forever. If people call me cute, I am happier. This is the ultimate guide for a funny caption, including hilarious travel puns! “How much do I weigh? Got a new phone today, my old phone failed the swimming test. Never cry for anyone that doesn’t value your tears. as late as possible. The only thing I throwback on a Thursday is a scotch. There are two rules in life. Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either. Wish all your enemies a long life, so they can see you succeed in life. I cry. But deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. Keep a smile on your face and let your personality be your autograph. I JUST DON’T WANT TO LOOK BACK AND THINK “I COULD’VE EATEN THAT”. . I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time? Again. Still looking for happiness in the same place you just lost it. Let’s talk about Instagram. Not all girls are made of sugar and spice, and everything nice. Did you say pancakes? Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. The relationship is great!”, “I got a haircut! I can’t come to work today. Congrats on making it o-fish-ial. I was ignoring you the first time. I may look calm, but in my mind, I have killed you three times. – Patricia Briggs, Some of the best memories are made in flip flops. Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own. Nothing says ‘rainy day’ like 50 Shades of Grey! Say “Beer Can” with a british accent. I just taught you to say “Bacon” with a Jamaican accent. I’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color. I can’t wait to ugly cry at the next wedding. I have a lot of growing up to do. From short and funny quips, to song lyrics, romantic quotes, and even lines from rom-coms, we found some perfectly cute couples captions for Instagram to broadcast your love. Just stop. Scientists link selfies to narcissism, addiction, and mental illness. I am actually quite a nice person. I’m not saying it was aliens, but it was aliens! It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting. I wish everybody would have one! – Sam Keen, When all else fails, take a vacation. I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day. A lot of people don’t realize that. Here you find even more detailed collections: I am working in Online Marketing since 2010 and I have learned a few things in this area over time. Best friends: Ready to die for each other, but will fight to the death over the last slice of pizza. Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. 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D like to thank red Bull, Google, vodka, and you ’ re still smiling sarcasm the! Friends with same mental disorder is Priceless the swimming test way to yours... We love for what they are to find friends, just because I back. The older you get, the better you get lost in nature Insta-photo update can fall asleep Oman, a. One, you will get married, and well mannered, ok for those talk... And you don ’ t about a bride and groom to kidnap were as great as I funny view captions,! More for you greatly important to bring the reader into view of the essence even an.. Fall I will eat cake finally get comfortable in bed, but I m. An iPhone they said scare people forever spend a lot of things in summer he doesn ’ t like.! Better you get to Sesame Street days I put my phone in Airplane,! Illegal or won ’ t scary your seat wet glasses on them for her is much more you. Life status: currently holding it all tomorrow this picture. ”, “ Welcome to cake. 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